One of those… days? weeks? years?

The weather is definitely not helping my chi… or ki… take your pick. It’s rainy, dreary, and the air is thick and heavy. Add that to my already high stress level from trying to clean up the space shuttle disaster that is my credit score/report (amongst other stressors related to my job and failed marriage), and sure enough I’m feelin’ the ulcers coming back.

Big time.

And this after a four-day weekend, too! I even watched Indiana Jones and it only helped for a little bit. I frackin’ (thank you Battlestar Galactica) hate it! It’s like I’m suck in a valley with no way to get to the top of the hill so I can see what’s going on around me through the trees. Oh sure, I’m walking along, but I’m constantly being grabbed by another briar patch or thorn bush or bumping into a dense copse of trees.

And get this: this Friday is a “Company Morale Booster Event”. Guess where I’ll be while everyone else is at a BBQ? In class, learning to use a system that our BRIGADE doesn’t use! If I’m lucky, maybe we’ll finish the class up a little early and I can swipe a cold burnt hotdog. Fun fun. I can feel my morale growing as I type.

Excuse my ranting, but this is my blog after all, and no one is making you people read it. All my posts can be happy or funny. I’ve got a lot of pent up aggression about this, if you can’t tell. Someone email me or something with detailed instructions on how to “let go” of something, because I sure as hell can’t figure it out. Man this pisses me off! Anyone reading this that knows me knows that this is because I’m so fracking dedicated to things I believe in.

And to top if off, I get a call from a certain person wanting to know if I can send them their share of some money via Western Union since it’d be easier (the unspoken part, I’m sure, was so I wouldn’t have said person’s bank information). I said sure, as long as said person was willing to pay the $51.00 fee. Oh, and this is after I told said person TWO WEEKS AGO that I had their share of the money. “Oh, well, I was just going to wait until I needed it.” Frack you! I should just put it towards what said person owes me and be done with it.  But despite all this, I can’t manage to stop caring about said person… and it makes me sick (not just figuratively).

ARRRRRGGGGGHHHHH!!!

I’m going to make some bratwursts. Catch you on the flip side.

EDITED: P.S. And this morning at PT I got a gnat in my eye and he never came out and I know he’s behind my eyeball swimming through my eyeball canal fluids straight to my brainpan.

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2 Responses

  1. Ryan,
    You need to take a deep breath hon! And listen to me!
    And, think about it… said person probably doesn’t have a bank account and that is why said person wants to western union the money to you!

  2. Oh, I know that’s the case. Said person told me they didn’t have one yet. I let said person know that I would be transferring no money to an account that had any name other than their own on it.

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